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דף ראשישלח מאמרהמאמרים המוביליםמאמר אקראי
שבטך ומשענתך המה ינחמוני
בקטגוריית טורים אישיים/ואמונתך בלילות
 
מ: רבקה
יוצר: רבקה
אי-מייל: שלח אי-מייל
נוסף ב: יוני 21, 2010
עודכן ב: יוני 21, 2010
צפיות: 4584
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המאמרים הפופולרים ביותר:
מה לקחת לטיול שנתי? (רשימה וטיפים)

 
האר עיני לראות בכל משענת ומשענת השלוחה אלי ממך ולהתנחם בה עד אראה בישועתך מהרה
ריבונו של עולם; לפעמים אני באמת לא מבינה אותך. זאת אומרת, אף אחד לא יכול להבין הנהגתך וחכמת מחשבתך, והדבר לא חדש לי. למעשה, חוסר הבנתי, אם נדייק, איננו רק "לפעמים", אלא ברוב רובו (אם לא כל כולו) של הזמן. ובאמת, ישנם דברים שקוצר הבנתי כלל איננו מפריע לי, אך ישנם דברים הפוגעים בי כל כך חזק... שאינני יכולה שלא לרצות להבינם. אני בוטחת בך, ריבונו של עולם, שהכל לטובתי אתה עושה, ובכל זאת – כל כך קשה לי לראות את הסוף. את התכלית של כל זה. מה רצונך ממני, ריבונו של עולם? מדוע כל הסבל והייסורים?

ריבונו של עולם; אני יודעת, כי סבלי וכאבי אינם גרועים כל כך. הרי "בתוך עמי אנוכי יושבת", ומודעת אני לצרתו של עמי. צרה הרבה יותר קשה, הרבה יותר כבדה מנשוא, אשר אורכת זה זמן רב. ומה זה כאבי ומשך זמנו לעומת כאבו וסבלו של עמי? מי אני שאתלונן על מכה קטנה כ"כ, אשר משך זמנה "בטל בשישים" מזה של עמי, אינו מגיע אף לא לרבע ממימדיו? (ובכלל, כמה מגוחך להשוות הכאב והייסורים האלו לאלו שלי) וגם אם אטען כי סבל של עם אינו כסבל של פרט: מה על אנשים יחידים הסובלים הרבה-הרבה יותר ממני? אכן, כאבי אינו גדול כ"כ לא ביחס לאומה, ולא ביחס לאנשים אחרים. אך מה הידיעה הזו תורמת לי? רק נעצבת אני לשמוע על שיש מי שכאביו גדולים וחמורים כ"כ. חוץ מזה, זה עדיין לא אומר שלא קשה לי. שלא כואב לי.

ריבונו של עולם; האם אני עשויה מאבן? האם לבי כקרח? האם אני כחפץ דומם שלא ירגיש כאב? שלא יזעק כשמר לו? ידעת, כי רק בת-אדם פשוטה אני. יסודי מעפר וסופי לעפר. ובכן, מה טעם יש בכל התהליך הזה? ימי קצרים ומועטים גם ככה, ומדוע לא אזכה בהם גם למעט מנוח ושלווה? ודאי, יודעת אני כי עולמנו זה הוא עולם העשייה. ובעשייה, כמו בעשייה – קשה. יש לעמול היטב היטב, לזרוע בהרבה דמעות כדי לזכות לקצור ברינה. כדי לזכות ולהניב פירות. אבל גם פועל זקוק למעט הפסקות. למעט מנוחה. אי אפשר רק לעבוד ולעבוד, בלי לנוח מעט ולצבור אנרגיות להמשך המלאכה. כי גם המנוחה היא בכלל העבודה, כאשר נצרכת היא למען העשייה עצמה. הרי אם לא אנוח, מה טעם יהיה בהמשך עמלי – עמל שיעשה מתוך תשישות הכח, וממילא לא יוכל להיעשות על הצד הטוב ביותר?

ריבונו של עולם; מה כבר בקשתי? לא פועלת עצלה אני, רק זקוקה למעט מנוחה. מה טעם יש לך בהמשך עבודתי אם תיעשה היא ברפיון כח, בתשישות ועייפות. ידעת כמה כואב לי. כמה קשה לי להשאר בשמחה תמיד ולא להתעצב בשל כאבי זה. והרי הזהרתנו "תחת אשר לא עבדת את ד' א-לקיך בשמחה ובטוב לבב". ובכן, למה זה תמנע ממני רגעים לעובדך בשמחה? למה? הרי כל רצוני הוא רק לעשות רצונך, והנה, אלפי פעמים פתחתי לפניך פתח כחודו של מחט... ולמתי תפתחנו לי כפתחו של אולם?

נכון, מי שלא טעם טעם המר ולא חווה צער מימיו, ספק אם יצליח לעובדך בשמחה כזו שתשתווה למי שכן טעם וחווה מאלה. כמו עני אשר נדיב אחד היה בעירו, ונהג ליתן לו מדי יום ביומו פרוטה לקנות עמה פת של לחם, עליה חי יום-יום ובאמצעותה התקיים והחיה נפשו. ועד שלא ישהה אותו נדיב פעם אחת מלהביא לו, לא ידע העני מה גדול וחשוב אותו נדיב, אשר עליו התקיימה נפשו. לא ידע הוא להכיר בערך ובשמחה שיש לו בו: כך אנו לא נוכל להבין גודל חסדך עלינו, ועד שלא תחסרנו, לא תהיה השמחה בך על כל שניה ושניה של הרחבה כ"כ גדולה ועצומה. ובכל זאת, מדוע תכביד משאי כל כך?

ריבונו של עולם; בך לבד בטחתי, ועוזר מבלעדיך – אַין. רק אתה תוכל לרפאני. רק בידך לגאולני ולחלץ נפשי. ניחמתי בשבטך, ולמתי אזכה ואתנחם גם במשענך? אנא ממך, ריבונו של עולם... אם לא תקל משאי מעלי, לפחות רק זאת עשה עמדי: האר עיני לראות בכל משענת ומשענת השלוחה אלי ממך ולהתנחם בה עד אראה בישועתך מהרה. ובכן עזרני רק בזאת א-לקי. א-ל אמונה.
לא למעני עשה – עשה למען שמך!

"מִזְמוֹר לְדָוִד: ה' רֹעִי לֹא אֶחְסָר. בִּנְאוֹת דֶּשֶׁא יַרְבִּיצֵנִי, עַל-מֵי מְנֻחוֹת יְנַהֲלֵנִי. נַפְשִׁי יְשׁוֹבֵב, יַנְחֵנִי בְמַעְגְּלֵי-צֶדֶק לְמַעַן שְׁמוֹ. גַּם כִּי אֵלֵךְ בְּגֵיא צַלְמָוֶת, לֹא אִירָא רָע כִּי אַתָּה עִמָּדִי; שִׁבְטְךָ וּמִשְׁעַנְתֶּךָ הֵמָּה יְנַחֲמֻנִי. תַּעֲרֹךְ לְפָנַי, שֻׁלְחָן- נֶגֶד צֹרְרָי; דִּשַּׁנְתָּ בַשֶּׁמֶן רֹאשִׁי, כּוֹסִי רְוָיָה. אַךְ, טוֹב וָחֶסֶד יִרְדְּפוּנִי כָּל-יְמֵי חַיָּי; וְשַׁבְתִּי בְּבֵית ד', לְאֹרֶךְ יָמִים."

[תהילים כג]





שתף/י בפייסבוק מאמר זה!


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אוהב-עולם פרסם תגובה זאת:
תודה על התפילות הזכות, שגורמת שוב להרגיש. להאמין. להתקרב. להתעדן.

רבקה פרסם תגובה זאת:
תודה רבה לך, שמואל. תמיד כיף לקבל תגובות (בין בכתב ובין בע"פ). לדעת שיש אוזן קשבת, עין קוראת... זה מעודד ומחזק אותי מאד. תודה *לך*.

רבקה פרסם תגובה זאת:
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וואוו רבקה, כיוונת ממש לרחשי ליבי בתקופה הזו בכל הנושא של עבודת ה' שבתקופה הנוכחית יש לי בעיות איתה.
תודה לך.

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"Humph!Inch Nguyen 1 snorted, they just don't challenge not necessarily listen to the language regarding his papa. Nevertheless, "when in charge foliage resting glass table, that is" Collision, slamming the rest naturally Miss Nguyen FIR in self-control. Fan Ye usually do not care, she rushed light look. Quickly pulled out a bottle from cherry for you to purse shared. Laughed:!. "One tiny capsule, Nguyen lady Get it,Inch "do not care" Nguyen FIR peek grabbed the tiny containers, Leng Heng explained. In addition, a peek of contempt seem. "Feier, your mayor needs to be the best thing to deliver. Take it.In . Next, resting complete opposite your terrain, "a commander viewed the girl child in to a weak giggle. "Dad, That's not me sick, eat precisely what medication this stressed globe, I would not understand. Precisely how the drugs are utilized to send, are afraid us all to obtain unwell. Did not know exactly what the Master Mayor Ann considered this?Inch Social FIR But a majority of words and phrases toxin. "How to speak!Inch Nguyen any menu in to the confront of your directed her to temperament this. "Nothing, Nguyen leader, do not My partner and i restore left.Inch Supporter Ye a little waved, a father along with child watched, laughed, "but present to you, therefore misinterpreted. These capsules, in fact, not really employed take in, is utilized to wash your ex confront. "" facial? "Nguyen a Fan Ye investigated, however combined with what exactly of great interest. "In simple fact, discussing the particular white-colored point of splendor is a female having a unique product or service.Inch Lover Ye weak huge smiles. "Shit plaster in addition employed to trick men and women, otherwise to be able to splendor damaged it absolutely was tragic.Inch Nguyen 1 contempt sermon, Supporter Ye looked over, directed towards the container sermon, "What can you call this substance, you'll find nations around the world Fda standards doesn't enable. have not tested the Pro chu?ng "" This drug, called harem Yuyan tablets. story Qing secret, ladies often use pores and skin has been drastically jade luster, however this substance is rare. In . usually would not desire to occur. Naturally, it is really an outdated preacher with genuine herbal treatments created. Mention country wide license, simply no. "Fan Ye just stop right here. Nguyen FIR truly chuckled, sermon,Inch A person blew it, and also come up with a professional on the old preacher. Isn't even going to the stage that Na Laodao who's a specialist Wudang hermit. You happen to be hard to find a pill than gold or something. Nothing more than a physician from your dirt using grass pills Bale. Throwing out therefore wonderful, that will total country woman in to the Queen Goddess, so you want me Kaka Lo white mice, when the analyze items. "Nguyen 1 whispered laugh, limitless delight she thought mention these types of words use a special amount. Entirely oppose the Fan Ye's encounter." While bright rodents, guinea pigs. ' lol lol, quite a lot of fairly well-known woman with this white these animals did this opportunity. "Comrade Nguyen FIR Supporter Ye indirect focus on, make believe you seem good, sermon." Also, "there is definately anything, god Gran, you will be making this buckskin punctured the proper day and I really need to hear both pour Which usually superstar clamoring needed just white-colored rodents. quite simply ludicrous. "Nguyen 1 function not really consider. Nguyen joined the particular odd issues is really in addition seems to be exciting emerged, with no additional chide your ex or something like that. "No, absolutely no!In . Enthusiast Ye waved, sermon, "I blew this place point even though sometimes lower leg, nevertheless the issue is not boasting. Otherwise, you need to ask the actual land collectively we Minamifuku????ook Mrs. Ms. blowing wind Yamei brain, isn't the scenario. Easily start off fast, Fengyun capsules, estimations don't get you. since not simply "the up coming land rebuild your Phoenix grandmother. "Fan Ye conversing, next put the jar into the carrier to set upward.Inch Qi????ook at heart, it is not Chi Zhentao ??€?mind? "At now, Nguyen entered questioned.Inch Indeed, that's him or her. "Fan Ye speaking, Hawkeye Yu Kuang-chung identified Nguyen FIR that his or her sight have already been staring at the bottle of drugs, deal with as well as putting their lip area. Seems" Mrs. Sarkozy's status is incredibly credit history, Nguyen FIR is obviously fairly persuaded. The lady knows, on this issue, Supporter Ye not be turmoil Chedan. Ruse, take note of Provincial faint????ook woman tall tale, that will not really head loath. Nonetheless, a girl point! For your "United States, the term, could be the endless matter. Boss foliage a light laugh, the medication bottle to the wages of the particular handbag. Nguyen FIR hitting their lips, Lover Ye discovered the woman's in the direction of his dad Nguyen entered the winking attention s?. Nonetheless, Nguyen joined but it is furthermore pretended to not observe related shook their go somewhat. "Ye mayor in order to Haidong drastic Haidong Men and women discuss lately from the high temperature foliage the particular mayor. "Ruen into huge smiles.Inches Oh, ended up being actually talking to me personally. Phone me personally "the gran regarding assault, the. Believed critique rather than to compliment this." Supporter Ye giggled. "Violence, assault in aspects of the violence have got depends on the celebration, for many poor aspects also do some haphazard abuse, will we start to see these crimson?In . Nguyen came into the actual hum. "The the latest govt given a removal plan Vanves Creek, leader Nguyen Whatrrrs your opinion?Inches Enthusiast Ye requested. "Vanves Stream, prolonged delinquent restoration regarding Ninety seven a long time in which large overflow, the opposite not to say that a majority of folks experience a gift filler Which water fierce ah, while lots of individuals passed away, of which half a dozen are we troops to conserve these "to climb. When Vanves Stream remediation great sometime ago, it wouldn't possess occurred. "Talking about this, using Nguyen came into frowned along with sighed. Recognize. Nguyen joined as they say, that is certainly opted for assistance their own plans associated with and some issues do not need to speak as well realize that the idea carefully this time around, a new serious visual appeal The f? people from the exterior within. "Mom, anyone come back? "Nguyen 1 seem, satisfied which ran f? male's hands tugging.Inches Ye who's mayor, Cai several weeks. "Nguyen an intro into a laugh monitor.Inches Hi there mayor. "Cai calendar month ahead was met with 1 Nguyen taken the bedroom muttering to go. YeFan in a cackle using Nguyen stood upward after some preparations to go away, anyway, the goal ended up being achieved, I really believe Nguyen entered already realize their particular which means. And then, Cai 30 days became available, smiled and also explained: "Mayor, My spouse and i noticed that which you get harem Yuyan capsules, perhaps Sarkozy ??€?remember Mrs. publications are generally highly regarded. "" We are right here about the quit one, anyone co-authored water put on the facial skin on the line. Influence must be great. "Fan Ye got your bottle given in the past, understanding that. Nguyen 1 will be projected to become in crunching the caretaker of the pills.Inch In which thank you. "Cai month would not hypocritical, right acquired.Inches Leader situation, this particular wines in your previous frosty tu? excellent. Before going for walks, so that you expand tu? out and about, I aim to provide you with a number of needles prick. "Fan Ye laughed.In . Mayor can treatment, actually extended coverage. "Nguyen joined giggled, wandered in the area, throughout out and about, for your physique unfastened garments, since Nguyen moved into think YeFan since mayor, will not likely unconsidered. Gran is really a indicator.Inch Young man which has a the art of organic homeopathy remedy Lang Junior high school, plus join in and also sense. "Fan Ye smile, Ma slipped to be able to throw your internal strength to remove your toxic needle, a few small needles down, Nguyen moved into sh?n Yin out of the blue a weep.Inches Exactly how, is not a feeling? "Fan Ye chuckled.In . Mum s?s? within looks like it's nausea, really secure. "Nguyen came into the smiles, your eyes l? will be surprised,Inch That's great, hit a few times, next remainder from the first 50 %, anyone previous cool tu?, must be practically the identical. "Fan Ye smiles effortlessly while walking, Nguyen may be provided for an access to the military sub-district military sub Supporter Ye's just getting out of the automobile right after that they obtained a phone call, a deep man tone of voice within sermon:." You're foliage In which the mayor, right? "" Oh, I used to be, you are? "Fan Ye pleasantly inquired.,In . I don't have to know what you are, on the other hand want to inform you one thing exciting. "Men's sounds reduced sermon." Oh yeah, meet with pay attention to? "Fan Ye faint questioned.Inch Which you arrive at business office, is just not becoming surrounded Soviet cow ovum. This disorder in the end just how, Cui Natural City Territory Office Secretary should know some thing, and metropolis panels of Mexico Receptionist Choi Dong Chen Qing metal rod attendant, Cui Qing know something, CHEN Dong also need to realize that. "That sounds a done following dangling in the telephone.In . Fellow Cui Qing, it really is you throughout dirty tips. "Ye drove straight to the boss whispered a municipal ??€?file publication accommodation far Van Vehicle failed to reside faraway from City and county Panel developing, playing Gao Hua Secretary-General stresses are living in an old home aged courtyard. YeFan car Enthusiast significantly on the residence, these people identified because Fellow Gao Hua really speaking about the idea, remember Van????ook accommodation really is aged. 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Vanves Creek removal is a advertising and marketing platinum nest, no money but sometimes not make a move. Also i considered there was clearly cash to ministries and states. Along with, today, the program is not applied, there have been plenty of bits fairly sensitive concern. "Fan Ye sermon." Fine, next the next day. "Actually, I am just embarrassed Enthusiast Yuan Ye Enthusiast, nodded.Inch There are a little love to are accountable to anyone regarding. "Fan Ye checked out Truck Considerably.In . An individual state. "Fan Ye Lover looking too far.In . Ahead of Vanves Stream task has not yet formally carried out, city body achieving there has handed down. Furthermore, features created an elegant file shipped to just about all pertinent sectors. Nevertheless, via things i started to see, isn't optimistic, and in many cases, fairly negative. "Fan Ye frowned.,Inch Oh, what happened? "Fan s? far too severe face up, indeed. 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Of course, if it could be attached with Tangmen in Ziyun situations, and whether or not right now there patron, won't endure any kind of mortification is often entry to means, reports, and even to the interior front door offers extra positive aspects. It is away from door disciple of advantages, Tangmen forces outside of the doorway is the lowest, however, when inside the doorway, Tangmen provde the rewards will be better, let alone in to the kernel. Whenever r?, take flight good ole' initial invitation, if there is absolutely no stick ?????fly stone talk about the actual delight from the kid, joined your Tang Males, than the r?, are unable to declare he's the actual Followers. Travel stone in no way surrender, Xiaodong movement also tempted often times, the past to join his Xiaojia Di youngster due to the fact one at a time, in order that his agency perseverance never to be a part of Tangmen. 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